Severely Blue, Severed From You

Do you feel yourself in this? The type of pain that rips like a hacksaw through your stomach and chest, but still you can hardly shed a tear…The hate and chaos streaming inwards. I seldom show when I feel low, but earlier today I was really grumpy hehe. Well I got this severely depressed feeling about some things (useless, pointless things), and all people around me were suddenly extremely annoying, asking me irrelevant things while I was sorting out answers in my head for these troubles, and I would snarl at them to stop pestering me!

Internet is a good medium to contact other people and get comfort, because it is not as intimate and it is a more anonymous way to communicate in. Often you don’t want to talk to your family and friends because you are afraid of their reactions, plus with family there is always a risk of awkwardness when talking about these things. Bombing some person somewhere behind another computer screen with long texts like this can be a great way of ventilating one’s thoughts. The other person will not feel as stressed to quickly come up with an answer, but can instead take his time, pondering the words he is going to say to comfort you. Or, check out FML.

Though, reading about other people’s tragedies might also bring you deeper down, so it is not a safe way to go either. This is because depression is a state of utter ego; of selfishness, even though we do not realize this. It is a state when your thoughts circulate completely around yourself, only are other persons on your thoughts because you miss them and want them to comfort you, or because you believe they dislike you. Therefore if proven that others have it worse, your destructive mode can turn on, calling you stupid, vain, selfish and so on for not thinking on other people, so still it might turn out worse.

So again, the best way is to talk to someone who will do nothing but listen to your thoughts, and comfort you. If you talk face to face, let them hold you. This releases chemicals in your body; chemicals that your body is lacking at the moment of depression and could quickly make you feel better. If you do not have anyone, gather strength and bravery to talk to people online, on forums or via chat.

Whoever you are, wherever you are, I am here for you. I want you to talk to me. I want to comfort you. For deep inside, I might truly love you all.

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2 Responses to “Severely Blue, Severed From You”

  1. Bra inlägg 😉

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