Archive for February, 2011

Vivre sa Vie

Posted in Film with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 16, 2011 by Eyeless

This is the scene (along with the dancing scene in Bande à Part) that inspired Quentin Tarantino to write the dance contest scene for Pulp Fiction. Thus the choice of music, the 60’s theme in the bar and Mia Wallace’s dance are no longer coincidal. I just felt like sharing.

Loss

Posted in Thoughts and rants with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 5, 2011 by Eyeless

What is loss? I asked myself last weekend, sitting by myself (as usual…) in my bedroom. I thought about how people often try to replace their loss with substitutes; something that gives them temporary relief; a supposed relief from pain. I wondered at the same time, why I have not done so.  Whatever loss I have suffered, that loss only seemed to give me (besides the obvious feelings of displeasure or grief) a greater inspiration in art, or I have gained a greater understanding of some sort. Out of loss evolves for me a newborn positivity.

Maybe this is simply my way of coping with loss, just as others cope with loss in their ways; by replacing sadness with a substitute that can offer the same exchange of emotions as the presence of what they once lost. But the only real loss is the feeling of loss. Whatever physical presence one loses, it does not really disappear, but merely scatters and transforms into something new; another physical form. But the sense of absence lingers still, a failure of acceptance; or simply a resistance against acceptance. However, due to this weird “cycle of death” there is no physical death or loss, and therefore there is no physical “hole” that follows death, which means that replacing and filling up a physically non-existing hole with physical substitutes to compensate for the feeling of loss should not be possible in a long-term time span. It may work for a various amount time between individuals (however ineffective it may seem), but absence is still ever present in mind.

So I came to wonder about all these grief-struck people; Will they ever get better? Is it constructive to replace loss instead of accepting it; instead of letting things be as they are? And is it really possible to fill up the mentally recognized hole of a lost presence with another presence? I do not believe that there are “correct” paths or “wrong” paths when it comes to handle loss, but I wonder if some of these paths lead more backwards than forward. For me I think, loss is really just a feeling, the perceived absence of a person, emotion or object, but nothing more, and I will have to accept this feeling of loss in order to accept that there was really nothing I ever lost. It is not lost just because I no longer can sense it physically, but it will always exist in some way. Apart from its physical absence or death and transformation, it will somehow remain present in my mind, ready to be recalled whenever I dare to remember.