Dream Notes from January 2010

I had a really weird and vivid dream about a year ago, and still remember it clearly. As it is such an interesting reading to me, I have decided to publish my notes taken right after I woke up from the dream, slightly rewritten to enhance a fluent reading of course. This is the first part which is not that weird considered it is one of my dreams, but from the second part and on it will just get weirder and weirder.

I.

Passing through the dark tunnel towards the bright white light in the far end; dragging some tied-up scumbag after us to slowly die, we sit in a red raft; Me together with my friends I possibly do not know; packed with all sorts of rubble and garbage. I do not reflect upon what he has done to us; somehow my memory is blocked that way. I can only recall him being a mad and aggressive, shapeshifting bastard turning from man into pig into -whatever the fuck that is; some bipedal half-breed of some sort. I do not care the least anymore; instead I resentfully hope his death will be painful. Before the blur shortly covers my memory and all turns into white I am reminded of a similar dream, but have no time to further reflect upon it until we all dissipate in the light.

The Uncomfortable Truth

How much truth can the human mind withstand? Such phenomenon as people merely limiting the amount of reality in their lives surely does invite the thought; People that would normally stand for truthfulness and honesty, but somehow fail to accept whatever image greater than their everyday life.

I have wondered how their vision of that great truth appears; and somehow in my mind conjured the image of a silhouetted raven claw, stretching out towards them from beyond their grey façade of urban concrete (to be unfairly dramatic)… A kind of threat that they will only have to deal with in their nightmares; “disturbing” dream visions that merely rely on the forgotten insight somewhere imprisoned in their subconscious selves.

So, passing on to the subject: What is an uncomfortable truth? When does truth start getting uncomfortable? When you realize you have not had any real jobs or income even though everyone else your age does; or when you’ve come to insight that the cent you just gave a homeless person ten minutes ago might offer him a warming cup of coffee, but still does not change his homeless situation? Or can you bear with it just until you realize that there are no laws in reality; no government and no morale, since they are simply mental constructions made by man himself because he cannot face and see the uncontrollable reality?

The truth and reality that I am talking about; the real world;  is unreachable since we are already limited to a certain level of consciousness, as we are born with numerous senses with which we can only interpret the truth, and thus never know or experience the truth in its full image.

However, what I am also trying to reach besides the quite nihilistic insight above, is that people limit themselves even further as they enclose themselves in their own mental constructions, based on their already false interpretations of reality (such as faith, moral, ethic, law, etc).

Though what partially severs me from the nihilistic point of view is that I do not try to reach the real world. If I did, I would be living a lie since I thus would be trying to reach a purpose and goal, which in itself is a construction (oh, the irony…). Instead I would rely on my pure awareness and acknowledgement of truth while remaining in a timeless place with one foot in the real world and one in the interpreted world. I would not believe there is a way of fully living in truth, but only to be aware of its existence.